We’ve all been there. The ambitious New Year’s resolutions made with the best intentions, only to find ourselves at the end of January feeling like we’ve already failed.
The gym membership gathering dust, the language learning app unopened for weeks, the healthy eating plan abandoned after a stressful day at work. But here’s the truth that might surprise you: you haven’t missed your chance. In fact, you can give yourself a fresh start tomorrow, or next week, or any day of the year.
(In fact, I made the point that January is a terrible time to make changes back in Ep 201 of My Pocket Psych.)
The power of the Fresh Start Effect
The fresh start effect is a psychological phenomenon that can give us exactly what we need when our motivation has waned. As psychologist Katie Milkman explains in her book ‘How to Change‘,
“…fresh starts increase your motivation to change because they give you either a real clean slate or the impression of one”.
The concept is beautifully simple. Fresh starts are about using a temporal landmark – a line in the sand based on a date – that gives us another chance at something. It could be the first of the month, a Monday, your birthday, or even just “today.” These markers give us a temporary boost in motivation, and while motivation isn’t always a reliable fuel for long-term change, that temporary boost might be all we need to restart.
What makes this particularly powerful is that it allows us to put our perceptions of past failure in the past. We’re drawing a line, starting a new chapter, getting a genuine fresh start. And it feels good.
Beyond just declaring a Fresh Start
Of course, simply declaring a fresh start isn’t enough. Every day could be a fresh start if we let it, and we’d make no progress while fooling ourselves that somehow today will be magically different!
The key is to approach your fresh start with what I call the three Rs: review, recalibrate, and be realistic.
🔍 1. Review, with honesty
Before you give yourself a fresh start, take an honest look at the past few weeks. When did you actually engage in your new habit? When did you not? What got in the way? What were you saying to yourself?
This isn’t about self-criticism or guilt. Remember, our real-life responsibilities can so easily get in the way, and there’s absolutely no point in beating yourself up. This review simply gives you the data you need to do better next time.
🛠️ 2. Recalibrate your approach
Your review might reveal that you were trying to do too much, or that certain days simply don’t work for your new habit because of existing commitments. Use this information to redesign your approach. Maybe you need to shift when you do something, or perhaps you need to adjust how you do it. Don’t simply replicate the approach that didn’t work for you. Use your review to identify the small adjustments that will make success more likely after the fresh start.
✅ 3. Be Realistic
This is perhaps the most important step. Be realistic about the fact that you’re going to be exactly the same person on day one of your fresh start. We can so easily believe that ‘future me’ will be magnificent, with untapped reserves of motivation and the willpower of a saint. But it’s still me, and no magical transformation will have taken place overnight.
Being realistic also means acknowledging that meaningful change doesn’t occur instantly or even in a straight line. Life isn’t as easy as we’d like it to be, and just because we want something to happen, it doesn’t mean it’s going to happen smoothly.
Fresh starts: the bottom line
There’s no law that says you must change yourself every year, and there’s certainly no law that says January is the only time you can do it. If you’re reading this in March, July, or December, the message remains the same: it’s never too late for a fresh start.
Using the above framework, a fresh start gives you the opportunity to learn from what didn’t work, adapt your approach, take a more realistic view, and ultimately increase your chances of success at whatever change matters to you.
So if you’ve been feeling like you’ve missed your chance this year, consider this your invitation to think differently. Your fresh start is waiting, and it can begin whenever you’re ready.
In the next post, I’ll explore some of the practical considerations when making a fresh start and share some simple principles which will dramatically increase your chance of success.
